Show Time and Again That Care
What to Do When a Senior Repeats the Same Things Over and Over
One sign of the crumbling brain is repeating things more oft, especially stories and questions. There are reasons for this that are non related to progressive atmospheric condition similar dementia, but in either case, repetition can get old very quickly. Even the most experienced and patient family caregivers occasionally struggle to hide their frustration. While there is no like shooting fish in a barrel fix for this trying side effect of aging, a change in mental attitude and some proven strategies can help you keep your cool and preserve your loved one'due south nobility.
On Aging and Being Repetitive
As we age, our perspective on life changes. There's a human demand to brand sense of what has happened in one's past and to contemplate what 1's legacy will be. Added years give us a risk to reflect on our past from a altitude and provide a unique signal of view that simply elders can fully sympathize and appreciate. Recounting old stories is 1 style that many seniors work through this process. Sharing experiences with those nosotros beloved helps us derive significant from our successes, failures, joys and hardships. This is likewise the fashion countless generations have secured their legacy—by passing down lessons learned and words of wisdom.
If an aging loved i retells the same stories every at present and then, and you think to yourself, "I've heard that a hundred times!" please have the patience to let them go on. They may be working through the past to notice a sense of meaning. Whether information technology's consciously or unconsciously, elders oft desire to figure out how these events shaped their present and will play into their future.
When family unit members and friends empathize the importance of an elder retelling personal stories, they tend to be more tolerant of the repetition. Furthermore, it'south of import to realize that simply because an elder repeats some things doesn't necessarily mean they have dementia. Their minds may not be as sharp or fast as they used to be, but some rumination and forgetfulness isn't unusual in elders.
Coping with Repetition Acquired by Dementia
Co-ordinate to the Alzheimer's Association repetition is common in individuals diagnosed with Alzheimer's or dementia, oftentimes in association with a person's want to seek comfort or security. My heart goes out to the many family caregivers who must listen to the same statement, question or story 20 times in one hr because a parent or spouse has some grade of dementia. Short-term memory loss makes information technology impossible for dementia patients to think what they just said, and so they say information technology again and again and again. Anyone who has been in this situation will tell y'all that at that place's a limit to how many times yous can muster a genuine response. Information technology's plenty to bulldoze a person mad. So, what can dementia caregivers practice about these seemingly endless loops?
Exercise Agreement
Try to understand that your loved one isn't repeating stories or questions to irritate you. Your loved one's brain is damaged, and they can't recall asking you what time their dr.'due south appointment is at or telling you lot that they need more than tissues at the grocery store, and so these things happen over and again. If you understand the reason behind repetitive beliefs, yous will likely find you tin meliorate control your irritation and be more than patient.
I rarely suggest comparing elders and children because I experience that besides much of this can skew our thinking, only in this instance, it tin can exist enlightening. Rather than using this comparison to justify treating a senior like a child, use it to change your attitude and expectations. Children repeat things often to better grasp and memorize new data. Most people are very agreement of this learning process and children'south limited capabilities. Seniors with dementia may be repeating words and behaviors in their ain quest to grasp or sympathise information.
We have more patience for younger individuals because they are growing mentally and we know that their questions and i-track statements volition somewhen wane. It follows then that we feel that this behavior is inappropriate for seniors who take amassed decades of knowledge and feel. All the same, the truth is that dementia patients' worlds do not make sense. Repetition may be an effort to process information, understand stimuli, or express a concern. It'south likely that dementia behaviors such equally repetition get worse over time, and so mastering empathy and self-control is paramount for dementia caregivers.
How to Deal with Repetition and Dementia
Dementia can cause patients to say and believe some pretty incredulous things, and many caregivers struggle with how to handle them properly. Depending on how a caregiver reacts, a patient may become fearful, paranoid, depressed, angry or even tearing. Navigating these situations is particularly difficult and takes a not bad bargain of practice, but there are three specific techniques that are recommended for coping with difficult dementia behaviors: validation, lark and redirection. On their ain, these strategies are useful, simply when a caregiver can learn to use them all together, it'southward a gamechanger.
The Validation Method for Dementia Patients
Validation simply refers to hearing out what a person is saying or feeling and responding in a supportive and empathetic way. Rather than reorienting a patient to reality or refuting their warped perception of things, yous admit their version and gently dispel any anxiety or discomfort they may exist experiencing.
For example, if your loved one says the grass in the front yard is blue, what does it hurt if you agree with this statement rather than argue that information technology's actually greenish? An appropriate validating response might exist, "Yes, it does look kind of blue from this angle." Acquiescing doesn't affect anyone negatively and your elder doesn't terminate up feeling like they're always wrong. Just keep in listen that validation is not tantamount to shrugging off the things a care recipient says.
Validation usually works, simply Alzheimer's affliction and other forms of dementia are unpredictable conditions. Nothing ever works 100 percent of the time. Information technology becomes more difficult to practice validation when an elder's thoughts are causing a corking deal of anxiety or agitation. For case, during a sure stretch of my dad's dementia, he idea there was a war taking identify in our town because he'd seen news footage of a foreign conflict on Television. I had one heck of a time handling this persistent mirage. I obviously couldn't just concord with him and say there was a war hither, because he was frightened. Instead, I entered his version of reality, acknowledged his concerns, explained that the violence was not taking place in our immediate area and assured him of his safety. I promised him that I wouldn't allow anything happen to him. Eventually, he let it go. In these scenarios, nosotros caregivers end up repeating ourselves, as well, which can exist exasperating. But we do what we must to keep our loved ones calm and content.
Distraction from Repetitive Thoughts
The next stride is to try to distract your loved one. Afterward the second or third repetition, try changing the topic of give-and-take. Mention their grandchildren and what they have been up to. Talk about an old friend who has done something interesting recently. Apply anything you lot can recollect of to pique their interest and change the subject. Depending on the extent of a loved one'due south retentivity issues, they may non remember these things you lot bring up, simply it can help them break out of the loop they are defenseless in.
Redirecting Someone with Dementia
Closely related to distraction is redirection. Sometimes irresolute the subject isn't totally constructive, then many caregivers redirect their loved ones' attention to a unlike activity that they can focus on. The bespeak is to provide an alternative choice that volition suspension the loop and keep an elderberry fully engaged.
Crafts, chores, snacks, watching movies or recordings of old Boob tube shows, and listening to CDs of their favorite music are especially constructive. Old photo albums are excellent for redirection likewise. Just try to utilize an album that contains photos from the distant past rather than more contempo pictures. A dementia patient's short-term memory is usually very weak and sometimes presenting them with documentation of recent events they do not recall tin can be upsetting. Long-term memory stays intact longer throughout the course of the disease, and then older photographs tend to exist a safer bet. Point out people in the pictures and ask your loved one to explain who they were. The chances are very skillful that they volition remember the photos and may even entertain you with a related story.
Take a Deep Breath
I don't mean to minimize the irritation that arises from elders repeating the same questions and stories from their youths. I also don't desire to imply that looking at an old photo album will solve the problem. Notwithstanding, these steps do piece of work for most people, most of the time. Remember that validation is valuable and kind whether dementia is nowadays or not. Information technology is oft worth your while to carve out a few minutes to distract and redirect. Keeping a loved one engaged will ameliorate their quality of life and keep your efforts from condign too tedious. If y'all find yourself getting overwhelmed, but step into another room for a few moments, accept a few deep breaths and and then attempt over again.
C
Expert Carol Bradley Bursack Minding Our Elders
About Carol Bradley Bursack
Over the span of two decades, author, columnist, consultant and speaker Ballad Bradley Bursack cared for a neighbor and six elderly family members. Her experiences inspired her to pen "Minding Our Elders: Caregivers Share Their Personal Stories," a portable support grouping volume for caregivers.
Source: https://www.agingcare.com/articles/elders-repeating-the-same-story-146023.htm
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